Blood Wolf Dawning Read online

  “I remember that,” she said with a small smile. “Chelsea was so pissed at Eric because he couldn’t stop laughing at how ridiculous her and the others looked, jumping up and down on top of Brody’s truck and screaming their heads off.”

  He gave a low laugh. “It was one of the craziest, funniest damn things I’ve ever seen.”

  “You calling me crazy?” she asked, playfully smacking him on the arm.

  A sensual smirk curved the firm line of his beautiful mouth. “Only in a good way.”

  Sayre rolled her eyes. “Gee, thanks.”

  “So what else can you do?”

  Picking at the frayed edge on her shorts, she said, “Well, there’s the healing ability, and the energy, light-shooting-out-of-my-hands part. Other than that, I’ve occasionally had some moments of what I suppose you could call ‘sight’—but it’s been a long time since anything like that happened.” Looking over at him again, she said, “As the energy thing’s become more powerful, it’s like it’s eclipsed everything else.”

  He glanced her way, then focused once more on the road. “So then what’s the story with the gun that you pulled on me yesterday? I’ve seen your powers in action, and that was before they hit full throttle. So why not use them?”

  “They’re not something I use in front of humans if I can avoid it, so I carry the gun.”

  “That’s understandable. But you could have used them on me.”

  “I could have,” she admitted, momentarily caught up in watching the way he was holding the steering wheel with his left hand, his thumb stroking over the smooth leather in a way that struck her as incredibly erotic. Clearing her throat a little, she added, “But the gun was more...impersonal.”

  He grunted again, which seemed to be his standard response when she said something he didn’t care for. They drifted back into another heavy silence for a few minutes, until her impatience finally got the better of her. Before she could stop herself or talk herself around in circles over whether it was the right move or the wrong one, Sayre tucked her left leg up under her, turned to face him and said, “So, I’ve been doing some thinking, and I need to talk to you about something.”

  The way his body seemed to brace itself, his muscles tightening beneath his skin, told her that he’d picked up on her nervousness. “Go on,” he said in a low voice, sliding her another shuttered glance before looking back at the road.

  “I’m, um, still coming to terms with how to handle this, but I don’t...I don’t want the time we’re together to be spent fighting. I want to call a truce. One where we don’t keep arguing about what happened before. All I ask is that you’re honest with me, even if it’s painful.”

  “Sayre,” he rasped, so softly she almost couldn’t hear him. His chest lifted with a deep breath, and she could literally feel the heat pouring off his big, powerful body, his jaw hard as he probably tried to work out where she was going with this.

  “I don’t know what you want from me, Cian. I don’t even know what I’m willing to give you. But I know that I feel better when I’m with you than I’ve felt in a long time. Maybe, if we work together, then just maybe we can somehow find a way to be...friends.”

  He swiped his tongue over his lower lip, his face and throat flushed with a heat that she wanted to feel under her mouth and against her tongue. “There’s just one problem with that, lass.” His voice was rougher than she’d ever heard it before, husky and deliciously thick. “I want to do things to you that I wouldn’t want to do to any of my friends, if I had any these days. Things I’ve wanted to do for years, Sayre.”

  Trying not to let herself get carried away with excitement over hearing him say he wanted her again, she pointed out the obvious. “You never seemed all that attracted to me before. Just possessive.”

  “Because I fought it with everything I had,” he growled, the tendons in his neck straining in a way that made her want to nip them with her teeth.

  Knowing this was make-or-break time, she clutched on to every ounce of courage she could find and went for it. “I don’t want to argue about the past anymore. What’s done is done, and there’s nothing you could ever do to make it right. But I...I want things from you, too.”

  His head turned sharply to the side. “What are you talking about?”

  Her confession came in a soft, breathless rush of words. “I want to know what all the fuss is about when it comes to pleasure and the man who was meant to be mine. I want to enjoy my time with you, the time that we’re together, however short it is.”

  Slowing the car, he veered onto the grassy shoulder, then slammed the brakes so hard she had to brace her hands against the dashboard. “Say that again, Sayre.”

  “I think you heard me just fine,” she whispered.

  The way he was looking at her made it difficult to breathe—her body all ramped up on hunger for the things she’d been missing out on. For a split second, she froze, wondering if she were doing this because it was the logical, mature decision, or if she were simply being steered by her hormones. Then she exhaled a shaky puff of air, watched his eyes darken as she licked her lips again...and realized that she just didn’t care about the reasons and justifications. She was doing it, to hell with what was stupid or dangerous or unwise for her future. The future was never going to be what she’d once hoped for, so she needed to take her happiness when and where she could find it. And that was here. Now. Right that very second...and as many seconds as she could have afterward.

  “Let me get this straight,” he said in a low rumble. “Are you saying I can touch you now?”

  “I’m not saying you can’t. I’m still figuring things out, and it’s not easy when you’re still not answering my questions.”

  “Christ, Sayre.” He sounded equal parts frustrated and turned on, which made her want to grin...maybe even laugh, which wasn’t something she’d done much of in a long time. She knew there weren’t many people who surprised him, and it felt good to be one of them. “Are you...are you blackmailing me with your body?”

  Instead of outright denying it, she gave him a look of open curiosity. “Could I do that?”

  The look he gave her in return was so freaking hot she could have melted right there in the sumptuous leather seat. Quietly, he said, “You’re playing games, lass, that you’re not prepared to lose.”

  “Not really,” she murmured, determined not to let him rattle her. “Because I think you’re making a bigger deal out of this than it actually is. All I’m interested in is scratching an itch that should have been dealt with a long time ago. So long as you don’t bite me and make a bond, why not indulge while we can?”

  Because of the life-mate connection they shared, Cian held the ability to create a permanent blood bond between them if he ever sank his teeth into her throat—and that was something she intended to avoid at all costs. She couldn’t think of anything worse than being stuck forever with a man who didn’t want the same things as her. Not that she even wanted a bond with him anymore. She would have to trust him...and love him first, and those were two things that this particular male would never have from her.

  He turned his head away from her, staring out the front windshield, his profile so stark he looked like he’d been carved from stone. “It’s not that simple,” he eventually said, sounding as if he’d had to force the gritty words from his throat.

  Sayre sighed. “Fine. If you don’t want me, then just say so.”

  “Not want you?” he muttered with a harsh, humorless laugh, shaking his head again. “I want the touch and taste of your body so badly it’s all I can do not to just take it.”

  “Then look at me, Cian.”

  He did as she said, the heat and hunger in those smoldering gray eyes making her feel stripped down to her bare flesh, despite the clothes chafing against her warm skin. In that moment, she could have been wearing freaking Eskim
o furs and she still would have felt completely exposed. It was a heady feeling, being the center of such intense focus, and the answering part of her soul gloried in it. Soaked it up like a freaking leaf with sunshine, even though her heart was screaming to be careful...cautious.

  “I’m not playing a game,” she told him, working hard to keep her voice even. “Yes, I want answers to my questions, and I’m hoping you’ll eventually give them to me. But I want more than that, and I don’t want to wait for it.”

  His eyes narrowed, the gray glinting like piercing chips of silver. “Then spell it out for me. In exact terms, Sayre.”

  She took a deep breath, refusing to let herself break eye contact as she put it all out there. “I don’t want either of our emotions involved. And I don’t even know if I want the full sex act. But I...I want everything that leads up to it.”

  “No emotions, huh?” It was clear from his tone that he didn’t like hearing that any more than he’d liked some of the other things she’d said to him since he’d suddenly burst back into her life. “Can you honestly tell me that you feel nothing where I’m concerned?”

  She couldn’t hold back the sharp burst of laughter that rushed up from her chest, her lips twisting with chagrin. “Oh, I feel plenty, Cian. Anger being first and foremost the majority of the time, along with a lot of other nasty things like pain and humiliation. But there’s also hunger, and I’m tired of aching for something I can’t find anywhere else. My powers have been keeping me prisoner for years, but here I am, sitting beside you, and I’m okay. Maybe...maybe if I work you out of my system, things will be different when you leave again. Maybe I’ll be different.”

  She could tell he hated that idea, as well, but didn’t have an argument for it. And, really, what could he possibly say? That he planned on sticking around this time? That he wanted her in a forever kind of way, just like her girlish heart had once hoped he would? Even if he tried to sell her on the idea, they both knew it would be a lie.

  Without a single word, he tore that heated stare from her face and looked over his shoulder, checking for other cars before he pulled back out onto the road and floored the gas. Disappointment settled heavily in her gut, but she refused to beg. “Is this your answer then?”

  “No,” he growled, squeezing the steering wheel so hard she was surprised it didn’t crack. “You want my hands on you, then they’re going to be on you. But that wasn’t the time or place.”

  Sayre was half convinced he was simply trying to buy himself some time to think of a way to let her down gently—until she noticed something that made her ridiculously happy.

  The hand he’d just shoved back through his hair was actually shaking, and she couldn’t help the small smile that crept its way into the corner of her mouth.

  Yeah, this was bound to end badly. And yep, she was most definitely playing with fire. Hell, she had the matches lit and was dancing in the middle of a sea of gasoline, splashing through it like a kid in a puddle. But maybe that was okay.

  Maybe—just maybe—it was about time she stopped playing it safe, and actually got a little burned.

  Chapter 6

  By the time they’d crossed into Maryland, Cian was in a world of pain unlike anything he’d ever known. He took shallow breaths and tried not to draw too much of Sayre’s mouthwatering scent into his lungs, but it was a wasted effort. Now that she’d admitted she still wanted him, there wasn’t any point in trying to keep his hands off her. He was locked on to every single detail of her, his hunger increasing with each second that ticked by, coiling tightly through his insides. Like a physical thing, it prowled beneath his hot skin, keeping perfect company with his beast.

  To make matters worse, the more time he spent with her, the more it became increasingly clear that he genuinely liked her. Yeah, he lusted after the little witch to the point that it was going to damn near kill him to walk away from her. To leave without claiming her in all the ways that he craved. But he liked the woman beneath that beautiful surface to an equally dangerous degree. She was funny and spirited and fascinating. Different from the girl he’d known, and yet, the same.

  Sweet, smart, beautiful Sayre. If he’d been a different man, with a different past...and a different future, he would have claimed her in a heartbeat. Even with that smart-ass mouth and attitude that could so easily rile him.

  Finally reaching his breaking point, he sent up a silent word of thanks to whomever might be out there listening when he saw the sign for a small rest area a mile up the road. They were in a remote part of the mountains and hadn’t passed another car for the last twenty minutes, so when they reached the turnoff, he took it and followed the dirt path into the trees, parking at the back of a small clearing that sat at the edge of a cliff. Restrooms and a few empty picnic tables were the only amenities, but the view out over the mountains was incredible.

  “Is there any particular reason that you’ve parked here?” she asked, staring out at the view as she undid her seat belt.

  He cut the engine, the air leaving his lungs in a rough exhalation. “You know damn well why I brought us here.”

  With a feminine little snort that he found entirely too adorable, she turned her head and gave him a cocky grin. “You’re too old to drive for long periods of time without getting out to stretch your legs?”

  Arching his right eyebrow, he said, “You’ve developed quite a gift for sarcasm, haven’t you?”

  Her next breath released on a sigh. “Sometimes life will do that to a girl. Does it turn you off?”

  “There isn’t a damn thing you could do to turn me off, Sayre.”

  She blinked at him with wide eyes. “Wow, you’re not holding back, are you?”

  “Why the hell should I hold back about wanting you? I wanted you when you were too young for me to even think about. Wanted you so badly it nearly drove me out of my goddamn mind. I want you even more now.”

  “Good,” she breathed. “Because I want you, too.”

  “Then come on,” he rumbled, reaching for his door handle. “I’m not kissing you for the first time in this small-ass car.”

  With a low, kind of nervous laugh, she opened her door and started to climb out. “This is a beautiful car, you know. You’re just too big for it.”

  Did she just call us big? his wolf growled, sounding smug as hell. She’s got that right.

  Shaking his head at the arrogant idiot, Cian climbed out and slammed his door shut. His stupid hands were still trembling like a boy’s, and he couldn’t help but shake his head at himself, as well. So much for his legendary reputation and control. All it took was a single heated look from this girl, like the one she was giving him as he came around the front of the Audi, and he was undone. Damn near knocked back on his ass like someone who’d had their legs swept out from under them.

  “I don’t understand,” he said when he was standing right in front of her and staring into those big, beautiful eyes, a shimmering ring of gold beginning to gleam around the smoky blue. It was like she’d been shocked wide open, her desire laid bare for him to witness, and it humbled him just as much as it scared the ever-loving hell out of him. “How can you do this, Sayre? How can you look at me like that? Don’t you blame me for what’s happening? For the fact that your life’s in danger?”

  She pulled in a deep breath as she stared up at him, and then slowly let it out. Voice thick with emotion, she said, “I actually blame you for a lot of things, Cian. If that bothers you, then don’t touch me. It’s your choice. I’m simply being as honest as I can be with you about what I want.”

  “You were never this bold before.”

  “True,” she agreed, keeping her gaze locked tight with his as she leaned back against the passenger’s-side door. “But a person can change a lot in five years.”

  “And some things don’t change at all.”

  “Are you talkin
g about yourself?” she asked, some of the light in her eyes fading, and he knew she was thinking about the women. About the ones he’d gone through faster than packs of cigarettes.

  “I was. But it’s not what you think, Sayre. I was thinking about the way you affect me.”

  The frown between her slender brows smoothed out. “Oh.”

  A slow, crooked smile tugged at his lips. “Yeah, oh.”

  “Tell me,” she said, the words soft and husky with need. “I mean, I know it’s really just the connection, but I’m curious if it’s as strong for you as it is for me.”

  “You want me to speak plainly?” he asked, his throat so tight with lust he could barely voice the question.

  She nodded. “Please.”

  Cian stepped closer and allowed himself to touch his fingertips to the pink flush on her cheek, her skin so smooth and soft it was unreal. She’d left her hair down, and the wind was playing havoc with the wavy strands, silky tendrils brushing against his forearm and across the back of his wrist. “I’ll tell you what I want, Sayre. I want you open and bare beneath me, your beautiful little body mine to do with as I please,” he confessed, the lilting burr of his accent thickening with each word. “I want you wet and desperate and begging for me, lass. I want to make you feel so bloody good you can’t do anything but scream when you come for me, your nails digging into my back and your body writhing. I want to get inside you, any way I can, and bring you off so many times you won’t even be able to remember what it was like without my hands and mouth on your skin, laying claim to every part of you.”

  She shivered, and he loved the way he could feel the warmth of her blush surge beneath his fingertips, her temperature spiking with the fiery energy of her power, tiny sparks of light beginning to glitter in the air around them. Her eyes were glassy with desire, storm-dark and eager, those slim rings of gold at the outer edge of her irises starting to burn even brighter.

  “I’m, um, good with all that,” she whispered, her little tongue swiping across that succulent lower lip that he wanted to catch between his teeth and suck on, hard. It was juicy and pink, the sweet rush of her blood lying just beneath the tender surface, and Cian quickly shoved that dangerous thought behind thick iron gates in his mind, determined not to let it take hold of him and ruin this unexpected moment.